


Striped Carnations

by aethkr



Category: Love Live! School Idol Project, Love Live! Sunshine!!
Genre: F/F, Flower metaphors, Hanahaki Disease, Heavy Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-14
Updated: 2018-05-14
Packaged: 2019-05-06 19:57:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,301
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14655071
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aethkr/pseuds/aethkr
Summary: Yō is selfless, she knows this.Yō loves Riko. She knows this but knowing that the chains has stopped her from going forward doesn’t make it hurt any less.(two hearts shattered that night)





	Striped Carnations

**Author's Note:**

  * For [coffee_o](https://archiveofourown.org/users/coffee_o/gifts), [sparkleworks1](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sparkleworks1/gifts).
  * Inspired by [A Rose Bouquet](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14566785) by [yousoro_nya](https://archiveofourown.org/users/yousoro_nya/pseuds/yousoro_nya). 



Yō loves Riko. That was the last thing she remembered before blacking out.

——

Flowers had different meanings, a florist can confirm this. A yellow tulip means that there’s sunshine in your — her — smile. A rose without thorns means love at first sight. A primrose means that you — I — can’t live without you (her).

Some of them have a single meaning. If Yō were to give a flower, she’d probably pick one with a single meaning. She wanted to get the message across and bringing one that has double-meanings especially if they’re opposite, will only bring confusion. I’ll ask you a question, do you want to be given a flower that has the meaning of ‘anger’ while also meaning ‘your presence soothes me’? Confusion is, without a doubt, a hindrance to everything.

When you are in love, it’s like walking on air. A yellow lily. You’re walking on air because the feelings of one person doesn’t confirm a relationship. If they reject — a purple hyacinth — you’ll fall from the air, you’ll crash into the ground. Do you notice how when people fall, they get dug into the ground?  They get stuck, they can’t breathe. Most of all, they’re hurt. If falling in love meant getting hurt, you wonder why you couldn’t be _in_ love instead.

Being in love with someone is wanting them to be at your side all the time. When they’re not with you, you feel alone. (A pink camellia)

Loving someone was different. You are okay even if they are not with you. After all, love isn’t always physical. You wish to see them grow into the best person that they can be. You wish for them to succeed. You wish for them to shoot for the suns for the moons and stars are not enough. You want each other to do the best. You become your partner’s best friend.

Loving someone also means allowing them to move on to greater heights, heights that you cannot reach. You’re okay if you’re left behind. You’ll be okay. You’ll sacrifice anything so that they’ll succeed. You know they want you to come, but if that meant giving up on something they fought for from the start, you know they should chase that instead.

Yō is selfless, she knows this. Yō loves Riko. She knows this but knowing that the chains stop her from going forward doesn’t make it hurt any less.

——

“Yō! Please wake up, please.” Chika’s voice reaches her ears. Yō wakes up, the relieved faces of her parents and of her best friend being the first thing she sees. “Oh, thank god!”

Chika let her tears fall but Yō’s too tired to assure Chika it’ll be okay. Besides, she’s too busy looking at the girl with long, dark red hair sitting near her.

The girl gave her a small smile. Yō held Chika’s hand, her eyes still stuck on the other person in the room. “Who’s that Chika?”

——

Chika and Riko invited Yō to eat lunch with them. It was your typical Saturday morning. Yō was nervous in coming to Riko’s place. There was something about it that she couldn’t place her finger on. She comes her every once and a while, asking Riko to assist her with homework or to help her study for an up-coming quiz. Sometimes, Chika would tag along and the two would eventually end up not studying at all.

Slowly, she knocked on the door and forced a smile when Chika welcomed her in. After pardoning herself for the intrusion, she greeted Riko’s mother, who gave her a smile in response. The two entered the dining area in which Yō greeted Riko a ‘good afternoon’ too. It came as a shock to the two, Yō never really greeted them. After pointing it out, Yō blushed, saying that she did it because of her mother.

 _“You and your mother look alike, so I guess I forced myself to greet you too.”_ They laughed at her response, saying it was ‘very Yō-like’. Chika caught Yō texting someone but decided not to press who it was. After saying their grace, they indulged into the food. Riko’s mother excused herself, saying that she had to go out to buy groceries. The three bid her goodbye and for some reason, any tension waiting outside rushed in. Yō started to fidget, trying to avoid eye-contact. Chika gave small giggles, wishing someone would ask her what she found funny. Riko stayed silent, waiting for the other two to take lead.

“Why did you invite me?” Of course, she just had to ask that didn’t she? Yō felt uncomfortable, the looks she got ranged from, “huh?” to “why are you saying that?”. “I-I mean, you could’ve ate by yourselves! You didn’t’ have to invite me!”

Yō didn’t want to be invited, was the first assumption.

Yō just didn’t want to be hurt, was the answer.

Yō guessed their secret, was the eventual thought.

“Oh, so you know now?” Chika laughed but it wasn’t fooling anyone. “That Riko and I are dating.”

“O-Oh rea— Oh! Yeah, congrats by the way! I’m sorry I forgot to congratulate you two. It must have been quite the ordeal to admit to feelings like that.” Riko and Chika looked at Yō once again, as if they were analyzing her. Yō doesn’t say words like that, especially around close friends. And what was she about to say earlier?

“You should’ve seen Riko’s face when I told her how much I love her!” Chika laughed truthfully. Yō sighed in relief, the tension slowly fading. Riko started looking everywhere else. “Like, she just stood there! She was sooo adorable! I should’ve taken a picture of her…”

“Chika! No!”

“Why? You were so cute! You were blushing so much, you were rubbing the back of your neck. You started to say sentences that didn’t even make sense! You even told me, “love you Chika too”. Yō! Could you believe that?”

“I guess I can.” Yō gave an apologetic look to the girl in question. “And yeah, there should’ve been a picture.”

“See! Yō agrees with me!”

 _Ding!_ “Oh, that’s my phone.” Yō pulled it out and frowned. “Sorry, I have to go. My mom wants me to help her with something.” The girl got her things as fast as she can, it baffled the other two. “See you at school!” She said, as she rushed out the door.

——

Yō cries easily when she was younger. When she gets hurt, she cries. When someone teases her too much, she cries. When her father left to go abroad, she cried. She still cries now that she’s older. Although she taught herself to hold in the tears and keep your head up high. It’s what made everyone think she had all her problems at bay. It’s what made everyone think that she wasn’t riddled with problems and drama.

Acting is a nice skill, after all.

——

Riko gaped when Yō asked who she was. The doctors came by before Yō woke up and told them that she was diagnosed with Hanahaki.

The question shocked her.

She dropped the small box that she was holding.

The bouquet of Azalea flowers that rested in a vase beside Yō’s bed withered. There was something about it that made Yō’s heart ache.

She doesn’t know why.

 

Inside the box, was a piece of paper that said, “get well soon” and a picture of Yō and her.

Riko doesn’t think it’ll be enough.

Riko kept the box to herself instead. Yō doesn’t need it. Not anymore.

Not when Yō’s heart has shattered and Riko’s chance to fix it has flown away.

——

Yō is selfless, she knows this. Yō loves Riko. She knows this but knowing that the chains will stop her from going forward doesn’t make it hurt any less.

**Author's Note:**

> Time for the meanings of the flowers to save yourselves the googling!
> 
> Yellow tulip: There's Sunshine in Your Smile
> 
> Rose without thorns: Love at First Sight
> 
> Primrose: I Can't Live without You
> 
> Petunia (hinted): Anger, Your Presence Soothes Me
> 
> Yellow lily: I'm Walking on Air
> 
> Purple hyacinth (context is different): I am Sorry
> 
> Pink camellia: Longing For You
> 
> Azalea (not a bouquet): Take Care of Yourself for Me
> 
> Bouquet of Withered Flowers: Rejected Love
> 
> Striped carnations: Sorry I Can't Be with You
> 
> EDIT: Apparently I spelled 'striped' wrong. I knew there was something wrong with that spelling...my bad. At least it's fixed now! :>> Have a nice day everyone!


End file.
